musician jokes

[Psalmist-=Of-God=- (Mike)]

How do you get two piccolo players to play in perfect unison?
Shoot one.

What's the difference between a fiddle and a violin ?
Who cares - neither one's a guitar

How do you know when the stage is level ?
The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth ..

Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune ?
Neither did I

Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners ?
So the rest of the band can understand them

What's the definition of a minor second?
Two oboists playing in perfect unison.

How do you get a guitar player off of your front porch ?
Pay for the pizza.

How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune ?
Evidently all of them.

What do you do if your bassist is drowning?
Throw him his amp.

although actually i did have one really good joke about miscommunication between Catholics and Jews which i dont think would be innappropriate but im holding off on it

[Peace-=Of-God=-]

  Yeah, best to leave that one alone (as indicated in the board description's rules) -- and especially since you're probably on thin enough ice with this one, with as many musicians as we have around here (myself included ). Pretty funny stuff, though.

[Splendor-=Of-God=-]

See they were funny but then the violin one was there . I happen to play the violin -- but good jokes no the less


God Bless,

Colby

[Champ-=Of-God=- (Eric)]

As a Drummer, I have to say I don't like the third one, but the rest were funny.

[Psalmist-=Of-God=- (Mike)]

haha theres nothing like a drummer joke, especially because ive been one for i dont even know how long, combined with the fact that i play virtually every instrument imaginable other than piano, i love em!

[Rancher-=Of-God=- (Ryan)]

I play the fiddle and laughed really loud on that one...Great Jokes :thumbs:

[Phalanx-=Of-God=- (James)]

How many trumpet players does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five. One to do it and four to tell him how much better they could have done it.

How can you tell a saxophone player is at the door?
He can't find his key.

What's the difference between a flute and an onion?
No one cries when you chop up a flute.

Two tuba players are sitting in a car. Who's driving?
The cops.

That's all the clean ones I can think of off the top of my head. I'll probably come up with more later. I still laugh at jokes like that, being a former band dork myself...

[Champ-=Of-God=- (Eric)]

lol, I like the tuba one. Hey there's no person better then a Band geek.