Post by Goodness on Feb 26, 2007 3:43:44 GMT -5
1)Jesus and the Robber
One night a robber broke into a home and heard a voice say, ''Jesus is watching you!''while he rumagged through the desk. He replied, ''Who said that?!'' Once again he heard the same thing, ''Jesus is watching you!'' The robber looked around the room only to see a parrot. He asked the parrot what its name was. The parrot replied, ''Cornelius.'' The robber said, ''What kind of a name is that?! Who names a parrot that?!'' The parrot said, ''The same person who named that rottweiler behind you Jesus!''
2)Dear God
A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened.
Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to the president.
The president was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill, thinking that this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to God, which read:
Dear God, Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those crooks deducted $95.00 for taxes!
3)Driving?
A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car.
"I'll make a deal with you," said his father. "You bring your grades up, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut, and then we'll talk."
A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car.
"Son, I'm real proud of you. You've brought your grades up and you've studied your Bible, but you didn't get hair cut!"
"You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that. Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair." "Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went!"
One night a robber broke into a home and heard a voice say, ''Jesus is watching you!''while he rumagged through the desk. He replied, ''Who said that?!'' Once again he heard the same thing, ''Jesus is watching you!'' The robber looked around the room only to see a parrot. He asked the parrot what its name was. The parrot replied, ''Cornelius.'' The robber said, ''What kind of a name is that?! Who names a parrot that?!'' The parrot said, ''The same person who named that rottweiler behind you Jesus!''
2)Dear God
A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened.
Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to the president.
The president was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill, thinking that this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to God, which read:
Dear God, Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington D.C. and, as usual, those crooks deducted $95.00 for taxes!
3)Driving?
A young boy had just gotten his driving permit. He asked his father, who was a minister, if they could discuss his use of the car.
"I'll make a deal with you," said his father. "You bring your grades up, study your Bible a little, get your hair cut, and then we'll talk."
A month later the boy came back and again asked his father if they could discuss his use of the car.
"Son, I'm real proud of you. You've brought your grades up and you've studied your Bible, but you didn't get hair cut!"
"You know, Dad, I've been thinking about that. Samson had long hair, Moses had long hair, Noah had long hair, and even Jesus had long hair." "Yes son, and they walked everywhere they went!"
